we will never sleep cause sleep is for the weak. & we will never rest till we're all fucking dead

i said before ill say it again if you think your alive your better off dead.
so throw your diamonds in the sky and we'll say gold forever.

ive had. minimal amounts of sleep.
last night. another fight
i should have known it was coming.
oh well.

its frickin friday
i want
to
frickin
nap
but
my mom
isnt letting meee!
frickin a.

pompeii
musically.amazing.
im not sure about lyrically yet.
haha
i think. they are .. one of my fav. rock bands.

so far we've escaped the day without any type of fightingg.
hmm
what to talk about.

i dunno.
highlight of the day.
got to spend extra time after school with malea.
enjoying each others company was nice.

so i ordered my lovely gf.
a giant dog stuffed animal.
how exactly giant you ask = 5ft
thats how giant.

ice cold coke.
possibly
be the best drink ever.

mann
i feel
weird

ive been extremly lazy & slacking in school.
thats not good
i dont know why
but
i am.
oh well!

im not homesick. im just so sick of going home.

bring me the horizon.
they may not be Christian
and they may drop alot of f bombs.
but
the lyrics are real.
they are legit lyrics
its not a bunch of bullshit.
this is how life really fuckinn is.

so pretty much for a long time.
ive been pissed at my mom
and the anger never goes away.
everyday.
i find something new to dislike
how can i not even like my mom as a person
as character.
i hate it.
i really dont like her
i think a lot of it goes back
to when i was young
and she was never there for me
she was nonexistent in my life
now.
its catching back up to her.
now
that im older
i realize
your character.
your a hypocrite.

fought w. malea again.

you cant possibly understand why i stay with her.
or how i do it.
or what the frick is going on
how much strength it takes.
to put back your heart together.
to understand
that
you
malea.

its not your fault.

you have been stabbed in the back
way to many fucking times.

you are worth all my time.

"we're done with giving a fuck"

im sick of being judged.
im myself.

imout.

today (feat. a pic from sun. & pics from today)

pinatas for the partayy. 

mwahahaha

mar arthur park ministry. 

the lost sheep. 

priceless working w. the little kids. 

so yea. 

malea one of my jokes to seriously and yea we fought again. but everything is good now. 

ive been feeling pretty lazy this week. no lie. 

ohwell. 

this week is going by so slowwwwwwww!

frick

1st post of 09. :[

my bipolar girlfriend has been playing w. my fucking heart.
i dont know if i can keep doing this.
you are fucking braking me into peices
then i have to find the strength to come back
&
say to you. i forgive you. its not your fault.
because its not.
its not your fault.

but deep inside i wish i could blame you.
because.
now
i have no one to blame.
&
im powerless.

i have no control over anything.
and God. is shooting some big bullets.

i cant break my vice.
vices like vipers.

i dont know what to do.
i cant leave you
i love you.
its not your fault
im sorry.
im sorry you drew such a small fuckin stick in life.
im sorry.

i love you more than you could ever imagine.
i know you love me too.
please get yourself together.

The water is rising above my neck
The tide, it is pulling me farther away from everything
That I have grown to love
Away from everything I know
Pull me back in
With all this said I know that you're afraid
But I can't go on unless you're next to me
Take me now
Oh my God why is this happening to me?
If this is the end, the worst is over
And all of this is keeping you calm
It's keeping you safe
It's keeping you quiet
It's keeping you safe inside again
It's keeping you
Pull me back in
I fear you are at the end
Pull me back in
I fear you have reached the end
It's keeping you safe inside again
It's keeping you
Awake again my God can we bury this?
The fear in their heart

in oceans by agraceful