since my last post. alot has happened.
..thursday night. she started to feel really depressed. she felt alone.
friday night. her mom was chewing her out for stuff..and..she almost.. yea. so. it was really hard on me.
i dont know how much i can handle . im being emotionally worn down. and..
now im really worried/paranoid that .. she is going to do something.
even tho she promised me she wouldnt do IT.
well. yea saturday igot to see her cuz it waas olivias bday. after everyone left.. it was jus me and her and i hlled her for a long time. i think that was really good for the both of us. .. i know for me it was. and for her. she said she felt..protected.
sunday was okay..my friend asked her if she wanted to to go therapy. but...she pretty much shot it down. and ive been reading alot and .. supposedly were not supposed to push someone into therapy.
today. we promised each other..to each other.
big promise
and last night.
i messed up really bad.
i kept begging her that she would call me when she goes to sleep like at 2 am or something but she really didnt want to wake me up. but finally i talked her into it. and..
i didnt answer.
i think thats litierally the first time i didnt answer my phone.
which leads me to be reallly worried about her. cuz i let her down.
i hope she didnt do anything.
yea. now. i sit here. and
im really pissed off at myself that i didnt wake up..
i messed up so bad.
i was freakin.
crying .
i hope shes okay.
i have to go to summer school.
...
sigh.
bye